As a state with one of the longest and most storied histories in our country, Massachusetts is no stranger to quirky and arcane laws. These laws may derive from Puritan norms of the 17th century or may come from more recent irrational worries. While I found myself extremely disappointed that some of these are more urban legends than past or present reality, I will be running through a few of my favorites regardless of their origin.

Stopping for red lights is not required by law unless they are flashing. Although this one is a myth, it takes about 15 minutes of driving in Boston to start believing this might actually be the law of the land. Misunderstanding statutory language about a steady red light or a flashing red light in the Massachusetts General Laws probably contributes to the development of this legend. However, even if the legislature decided to tighten up this language, I highly doubt that drivers in this state would engage in a thorough interpretation and reform their ways on the roads.

In Boston, duels on Sundays are legal as long as the governor is present. After a decent amount of research, I have absolutely no idea where this comes from. Most of these laws, real or fake, have at least some explanation, but this just seems like pure imagination. In fact, dueling has been illegal in Massachusetts since 1719. While this may come as a disappointment to some, it is good news for Knicks fans like me. Not even Maura Healey can shield TD Garden’s barbaric crowds from liability.

It is illegal to injure someone else’s pigeon or scare and harass pigeons generally. We have finally reached one that actually exists! Ch. 266 § 132 of the Massachusetts General Laws still graces us today with this remnant of the past. In the colonial era, pigeons were considered valuable property for sending messages or racing, and interfering with them could bring hefty penalties. Carefully consider your reaction the next time one of our feathered friends politely walks up to you for a bite of your sandwich.

Gorillas are not allowed in the back seats of cars. Believe it or not, this one is technically true although the statute preventing this does not explicitly specify gorillas. Ch. 90 § 22H of the Massachusetts General Laws broadly bans transporting animals in the back seats of cars unless certain conditions are met. I will not bore you with the specifics, but it is safe to assume that gorillas do not satisfy these conditions.

It is illegal to play the fiddle in Boston on Sunday. Another contortion of old Puritan Blue Laws regulating public behavior, this most likely comes from resident complaints of rowdy taverns at night. It is nice to see that noise complaints have a long historical record, and that I can still return the favor to raucous college students when I get older.

Defacing a container of milk is subject to a fine of up to $10. This law, while real, doesn’t actually mean anything for milk haters today. The law specifies “milk cans” rather than the cartons or plastic jugs that milk is currently stored in. I had never heard of a milk can before, but if you shop for one online, it will apparently set you back far more than $10.

I hope you have enjoyed learning about this mostly useless information. If the drudgery of law school or practice starts to set in, remember that you are standing on the shoulders of giants. As the law continues to evolve, we all get to be a part of the continual story of trying to create a social order for the benefit of all, even when seemingly insignificant action is required on automotive gorilla transportation.

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Joe Monti is a first-year student at BC Law. Contact him at montij@bc.edu.